{"id":1115,"date":"2021-02-04T20:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-02-05T03:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/?p=1115"},"modified":"2021-02-05T07:04:36","modified_gmt":"2021-02-05T14:04:36","slug":"masquerade-am-i-a-fraud","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/archives\/1115","title":{"rendered":"MASQUERADE: AM I A FRAUD?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

In The Third Grace<\/span><\/a><\/strong>,<\/em> my character Ebenezer MacAdam owns Incognito Costume Shop and individually recommends rentals based on a client\u2019s personal character. He says,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019d like to think the purpose of my costumes has been to reveal the real in this masked and disguised generation. But on a grander scale, I myself am being unmasked and my failure laid open to my own view. So many of my years I spent fearing to be discovered for the fraud I really am.<\/strong> Yet here it is the autumn of my life and I stand naked, as it were, before a Judge more kindly than myself.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Eb\u2019s words issue from a conflicted spot in my own soul. I\u2019d like to think the purpose of my writing is to speak a message of truth to this generation and yet\u2014like him\u2014the very act of my service exposes me to the truth of my own shortcomings. Doesn\u2019t my choice of words (like his choice of costumes) say more about my own heart attitude than that of the reader whose heart I\u2019m judging?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I, too, fear being found out for the fraud I really am.<\/span><\/em><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

It started early in my life\u2014this suspicion that I wasn\u2019t all that I wished I were or that I portrayed myself to be. When I memorized my spelling list and won the elementary bee, I was self-satisfied but suspected the triumph was a fluke. When I earned honours in graduate school, I delighted in the accomplishment but credited grade inflation. Innately knowing that proficiency can become the breeding ground of pride, I tend to demur: \u201cOh no, I\u2019m not that talented. It was luck. I don\u2019t deserve the praise.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s actually a psychological label slapped on this condition when it\u2019s pathological: \u201cImposter Syndrome.\u201d I rush to say that I\u2019ve not<\/em> been diagnosed; most healthy people to some degree attribute success to luck, reject compliments, or think, \u201cAnyone could have done this.\u201d I suspect it\u2019s a well-intentioned attempt at humility.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What\u2019s the line between humility and hypocrisy?<\/span><\/em><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Jesus denounced as hypocrites those who ostentatiously fulfilled religious responsibility for public applause, describing the sanctimonious Pharisees with hearts full of greed and self-indulgence as whitewashed tombs and dirty cups (Matt. 6:2, 5, 16; 23:25-28). The word \u201chypocrite\u201d comes from the Greek stage, where an actor would hold up a mask indicating one emotion while displaying a juxtaposing facial expression revealing his true feelings. \u201cThese people honor me with their lips,\u201d Jesus said, \u201cbut their heart is far from me\u201d (Matt. 15:8 NIV). Hypocrites receive their reward in time; no reward awaits them in Heaven.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The deciding factor between true humility and the falseness of hypocrisy, then, seems to be the heart intention of the worshipper\/writer; honoring the Lord with my lips\/keyboard for temporal reward isn\u2019t synonymous with bringing my heart close to Him. The very public nature of writing for reader feedback (comment on a blog, payment for an article, placement in a competition) forces me to investigate my motives.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Does my fa\u00e7ade match my heart attitude?<\/span><\/em><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The sixteenth-century Reformer Jean Calvin wrote in his Institutes <\/em>(1.1.1-2),<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Without knowledge of self, there is no knowledge of God . . . Without knowledge of God there is no knowledge of self.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

The only way to know God is through His Word (Living via Written). Humility is seeing myself as I really am, in light of God\u2019s gifting. When I look clearly and honestly at my own heart, I am driven back into the Bible, where I must face my motivation and ask myself truly:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do I write for recognition by my readers or for reward by my Creator?<\/span><\/em><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The stardust of long-awaited, hard-won, now-realized publication threatens to blind me. The only way I see to avoid hypocrisy\u2014that veneer of false humility\u2014is to face the \u201cshaming nakedness\u201d (as Calvin put it) of my own insufficient human efforts. This readies me for the revelation of the righteousness that exists in God alone, the thrill of embracing His gifts to me. I can see myself in perspective not<\/em> as I measure up to my idea of authorial success but only<\/em> as I see God\u2019s flawless provision for my imperfection. On this basis I take joy in unearned grace (of salvation, of course, but also of ongoing achievements) while simultaneously facing my fear of exposure without hiding behind a mask of self-effacement. God is the ground of my humility, the Giver of all gifts for the purpose of His glory.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I find writing to be a humbling and unmasking experience.<\/span><\/em><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

(Originally appeared in a blog of Janet Sketchley)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In The Third Grace, my character Ebenezer MacAdam owns Incognito Costume Shop and individually recommends rentals based on a client\u2019s personal character. He says, I\u2019d like to think the purpose of my costumes has been to reveal the real in this masked and disguised generation. But on a grander scale, I myself am being unmasked […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[91,89,97,93,96,94,95,90,92],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1115"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1115"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1115\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1175,"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1115\/revisions\/1175"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1115"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1115"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rolledscroll.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1115"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}